Housewives. Real and ABC

Dear Kate (still my only reader), 

This week, the Wisteria Lane Housewives came back. And I have to say, I was not impressed. They left us hanging on some serious cliffs last May, so I was expecting a cracked out, all explosive episode...plane crash or tornado episodes anyone? But, to me it was just lame. Although they did bring back Felicia Tilman who always gives me the heebeejeebees, and really did this week when they kept showing her 3-fingered hand. But that was the only exciting part. I am not happy with where Susan and Mike's story line is going. Lynette's kind of lame. Gabby and Carlos are headed into very dangerous territory. And Bree, well, I miss Orson, but the BAG story could be good. 

Then there's the Real Housewives...We see Orange County wives filing domestic dispute cases. New Jersey hubbies are going to jail for 10 days and oh yeah, they have a crackhead running around. DC has people breaking into State Dinners. New York has people saying that they are quitting, then turn around and are on the show. And then there's Atlanta which is just always crazy. I haven't watched Bev Hills, but that's got Fraiser's ex wife so that has to have dirt on my favorite radio psychatrist.

I'm a fan of the Housewives series, well excluding Atlanta, DC I really think I would enjoy, and I could do without NY, but I think they are trying to take over too much territory. For example, you already have OC, must you need Beverly Hills? What about a Real Housewives of Weed County? Or of Kansas City? Or Toledo? Not glamourous I know, but they are unexpected territories that could have some crazy ladies spending their fam's cash like it's nobody's business on crazy things like beef jerkey, tang, John Deer products. 

I don't know if I would watch it, but at least it would be covering a new area that isn't already covered in a reality show cloud. 

JSimp

Dear Kate (my only reader),

Yesterday we had a heart to heart about someone who we used to support with her husband and her happy life. I won't dwell on the sour parts or how she broke a certain someone's heart and stomped on the broken pieces. Alas, that was in 2005--actually Thanksgiving 2005-- and so we thought she had taken the public beating she so well deserved and it was now time to move on. All because of one US magazine article about how she dropped her former best friend for her new boy toy.

As much as it pains me to say that I forgive Jessica for making poor decisions, the time has come to begin the healing process. Nick had a sa-weet album, happy and found love again with Vanessa, and clearly won over the public. Jessica is working the circuit with the professional football players and has her clothing line. Joe Simpson is out of our faces. It's a win all around. Now, if there's any scandal with them that gets dragged through the media, there's no choice with who's team to be on, but the time has come to forgive.

I don't think any one can really forget the Behind the Music: Nick Lachey that came a short time after their divorce was finalized. And I think that showed the world that he really just wanted to be married but she had different priorities. (That part where he talks about the first time he held his niece and how everything else just seems insignificant. Profound. Moving. Touching.)

Perhaps they just married too young. Perhaps her father just played too much a roll in her life. Perhaps Nick just deserved better (duh). Whatever the reason for that break up heard round the world, they have both moved on. Their marriage may be one of those small Wikipedia entries 45 years down the road that no one remembers. They may one day become friends. No one really knows what's in store for one of Reality TV's first couple. All I know is that today, I am ready to forgive.

Unless she pulls any shit.

Lilo's Fate...

Tomorrow the book gets thrown at Lindsay Lohan. Or at least that's what I think. Well, when I say get the book thrown at her, I mean she would get 30 days in prison. And by prison, I mean low security county jail. And by 30 days I mean she'll be out in 4 days. Why so low? Because of California's over crowded jails. So where will she go from there? Rehab. And by rehab, I mean an ultra-exclusive, no civilians, only celebrities "center" that's really some friend's house in Southern California. Where in SoCal? Orange County...the prettiest part, duh. Then of course, it's her friend so they will release her early, saying she's healthy but it's really because he wants to make room for Amy Winehouse--that's right she's finally gonna go to rehab, yeah yeah yeah--and Lindsay's got to start filming her new movie. Everyone will think, oh she's been through this twice now, so she'll straighten up. And so she'll be "smooth sailing" for a couple of weeks. Making money on her new movie, and then one night she'll be walking out of a club with some crack on her shoes. People, Us, Star, The Globe will have their lead story for a while as we await the next court date. Here we go again.

Ok I've got 10 on my theory.

Is 55 Stories really that tall?

Last Saturday, Christopher ventured to Denver for an annual climb up Denver's tallest building, which is apparently 55 stories. I believe he does it every year along with a bunch of other firefighters in honor of the September 11th attacks. Not only did he run it once, but he did it twice in all his gear.

Now 55 stories is tall, but when you compare it to some of the tallest buildings in the country, is it really? The Willis Tower in Chicago is currently the tallest building in the country at 108 floors, and of course essentially famous for that scene in "Adventures in Babysitting" but then you hear about the Empire State Building in it's ArtDeco 102-story glory and the 100-story John Hancock Tower in Chicago. Don't get me wrong, 55 stories are more than what I would want to climb for kicks on a Saturday, but when I found out that it was the tallest building in the state's capital I was taken a little aback. I did do some more investigating (I mean, for the blog I will research anything...and it also takes up part of the day) was surprised to find the tallest building in SF, the TransAmerica building was only 48 and that it is the tallest skyscraper in the city's skyline. Who would have thought Denver would have a taller skyline than SF? Definitely not me!

Anywho, back to the story at hand, CJB ran up and down this building twice, and made the newspaper and decided that he's famous! Mom thought it was super impressive that after running up and down this building twice, that he was standing up in the picture, but come on Mom! Of course he's gotta show that he's tough stuff for the newspaper!


Here's the link for the article...
http://vaildaily.co.ussrv15.newsmemory.com/loadPage.php?token=5bXOz9LC39Xab3SRo5KVp5ihg5WTotfa15F5c5OjksTPlqeLkpSgmqOcmXRvlqmT

My Saturday Morning

After a trip to the gym this morning, Lisa had a craving for some Jamba Juice and I really wanted an iced tea. Where can you get both of those on one quick stop? The Best Buy shopping complex. So we motor over that way and there was a line of cars trying to get into the parking lot (only one way to get into the lot...not ideal) and an even longer line to get out. We had the windows rolled down, and this older lady in a caddy convertible was driving out and she mentions to us "There's a bomb threat in the complex. There's a bomb threat in the complex." And she kept saying it to every car behind us. First thing that ran through my mind, get me the eff out. Of course, Lisa took her sweet ass time trying to maneuver the other cars that were making their great escape, or just the families who were strolling through the parking lot making their way to Jamba.

I spotted a few police cars surrounding a couple of cars so naturally I thought that they were the bomb holders and what was just beyond the cops? Oh a family just chillin. Meanwhile, I'm freaking out that a bomb could go off any second telling Lisa to take charge and not let other cars cut in front of her. Well finally we were out of there, and headed towards the other Starbucks (god forbid Lisa didn't get an Iced Tea) .

But seriously, San Carlos? Since when did we hit the bomb threat list?

"Celebrities" who are bugging me

If we would call them this, but these people are just bugging me...and in now particular order, well except number one, because she really pisses me off::

1. Melissa Rycroft
2. Kate Gosslin
3. Heidi Montag
4. Danielle Staub
5. Kristin Stewart
6. Jesse James
7. Jake Pavelka
8. Jessica Alba
9. Tom Cruise
10. Bristol Palin
11. Dina Lohan
12. Angelina Jolie
13. Paris Hilton
14. Vanessa Hudgens
15. Mel Gibson

We fell into Fall

When did this happen? Where did summer go? It seems like yesterday it was Memorial Day weekend but we just wrapped up Labor Day! Kids are officially back in school--well not the Quarter kids, shows are beginning to come back, summer series are wrapping up and there is definitely a chill in the air.

Speaking of chill...who saw New Jersey Housewives Reunion? This season's reunion was definitely the most outrageous and half of the show is not audible because people are bitching over other people, people were screaming at each other, f-bombs were dropped like nobody's business. It was definitely something that you have to watch more than once so you can understand what the hell was going on, but it's too much! Within the first 10 minutes, Teresa was off the couch screaming at an extremely high pitch, knocking people over. I thought that was the biggest showdown, then I remembered that it was 10 minutes into a 2.5 hour reunion special. Then the hits just kept rolling. To put it lightly, this was out. of. control.

I think the best part was after Kim G was on and the ladies were chatting with Andy Cohen about how they all are not friends with her. The whole group was saying that they hated this broad and then Andy mentioned that they all agreed on it...Nope they can't even agree on that.

These are some craaazy bitches. I love them but they be crazy.